Dispatches from the CAPY Multiverse Vol. 1
Welcome to the Dispatches from the Multiverse, Volume 1! We’ve tasked our intrepid reporter, Hank Hudson, in gathering updates and notes from across the CAPY multiverse. We’re excited to bring you news, updates, and the weird happenings from across all our games. Who doesn’t like when new friends and old friends meet?
GRINDSTONE
Jjertrude ignored the interview questions I sent her, and instead sent me this note:
Ever since I was forced to let people into the Shrjine of the Grind, my life has been very noisy. Begrudgingly, I must admit, it’s also at least a little bit exciting. Stonegrinders left and right are just hurling their bodies at the Greed Grind, trying to best their friends in getting the most grindstones. Their bloody sacrifices inspired me to open the Quick Grind: a faster way to chop Creeps and embarrass themselves in front of the old gods!
The Ancient Board of Leaders is filling up and — you ever repeat this next bit and I will send a horde of aggro’d Creeps your way — I’ve even been impressed once or twice. Maybe I’m looking forward to seeing what names top the Ancient Board of Leaders each day. Maybe — but you can’t prove it and I won’t repeat it.
-Jjertrude the Jjlorious
She’s holding down the fort in HjellHjole just fine.
Grindstone is available now on Apple Arcade, and coming soon to Nintendo Switch.
CRITTER CRUNCH
Biggs sent in the following photo and said:
“Everything normal on Krunchatoa Island, nothing to report here.”
Critter Crunch is available on Steam and the Playstation Store.
SUPER TIME FORCE
We checked in with Commander Repeatski and his Super Time Force to see what they’d been up to in the past/present/future.
Cdr. Repeatski sent this dispatch:
Dateline: Himalayan mountains, Tibet-Nepal border, May 29th, 1953.
The STF and I are at the peak of Mount Everest. What a view… of nothing! You can’t even see the Statue of Liberty from up here! I don’t get the hype!
Anyway, we’re waiting to conduct a routine timeline-reorientation (aka changing the past so that the future no longer sucks!). Any minute now famed Kiwi mountaineer, explorer and philanthropist (aka “rich guy”) Sir Edmund Percival Hillary is going to be the first person to reach the summit of Everest.
This historic act inspires thousands of other rich doinks to follow his lead and results in decades of deaths, tons of embarrassing helicopter rescues, a bunch of dumb movies, and turns half the mountain into a trash dump! But what if Sir Hillary never reached the top? Then doctors, lawyers, hedge fund managers and the like would spend their money on normal stuff like yachts and panic rooms. Here’s the plan: every time Sir Hillary is about to reach the pinnacle we’re going to TIME OUT (my patented tech for pausing and rewinding the entire space time continuum, no biggie) and then move him back down the mountain a few hundred feet and then hit PLAY on the world again! He’s going to keep thinking he’s about to make history and we’re literally going to keep it juuuust out of his grasp! Hahaha he’s going to go bonkers! Oh my gosh I just had an amazing brainstorm for a TV show: a historical prank show! Columbus thinks he’s about to discover the New World? Sorry, paisan! God, I love my job!
Oh wait, I hear some grunting and scrapy boots sounds.
TIME… to go to work!
Super Time Force Ultra is available on Steam, Xbox, and Playstation.
MORE & MISCELLANY
- ICYMI, the CAPY team got together (digitally, of course) and celebrated Halloween by carving Creep-themed jack-o-lanterns. Featuring a few pumpkins carved in Adam Robinson-Yu’s Mayor Bones Proudly Presents: Ghost Town’s 999th Annual Pumpkin Festival!
- Grindstone OST composer (and beloved pal) Sam Webster did the OST for just-released Reigns: Beyond and we might be biased, but it’s a total banger. Check it out!
